An unfortunate real life incident I had to witness quite recently! Not a fiction even though I wish it was one! I first met her when we shifted to our new flat. She stayed in our neighbouring flat with her parents. I was looking for some little kid nearby as the place was new and my daughter needed to have someone for company. She looked almost the same age as of my daughter and I was happy when I saw her.
I went and talked to her parents. They were not natives of my state, but was staying here as they both work in the IT companies nearby. The girl was just one year older than my daughter. A pretty, lean girl with slightly wavy hair. She spoke in fluent English much to my amazement. Here my daughter barely knew 4-5 English words whereas this girl spoke English so well! Later her mother told me that they all speak English at home so that the girl learns to use the language well.
The Rebellious Girl
Soon, I invited her to my home to play with my daughter and another little boy who stayed nearby. That is when I noticed her rebellious nature. I’m also a mother and I do understand that kids can be a bit cranky, can fight for even a small piece of paper and can have meltdowns anywhere and everywhere. But, this girl was different. She always had a rebellious nature. She was always fighting with other kids and pushing them. I wondered why she is like this and then brushed away my thoughts as I thought, well, she is a little girl. My daughter too gets a bit off-hand at times! Maybe she is just cranky as she is tired or something. There is no need to judge a little 4 year old girl! I rebuked myself!
The Rebellious Girl Whom Everyone Steers Clear Of!
Soon, I understood that my first impression of hers was not wrong. She always had this rebellious nature be it while playing in the park downstairs or while playing with kids near her flat. I heard many moms talking in hushed tones that this girl is very bad and they won’t allow their kids to play with her. God knows if she might hurt their kids? I felt bad for this girl and at the same time I also had to agree with other mothers as she was indeed very rebellious and I was also afraid to let her play with my daughter. We mothers do get a bit selfish when it comes to our kid’s safety and I was also no different. Still, I wondered why she is like this. I didn’t feel like hating this girl. After all, she is also a little girl like my daughter. Something, somewhere was amiss!
The Girl Who Is Shouted At Even While Cutting Her Birthday Cake!
Soon, it was her birthday. Usually, in our flat all the kid’s birthdays are celebrated by calling all other kids over to their place. There will be a small cake cutting and some evening snacks for the kids. But, it was her birthday and I understood it as she had gone in colour dress to school that day. All the kids were telling it is her birthday. But, still no one invited us over for her cake cutting. I thought it was strange as we lived just next door. I guessed maybe they are planning to celebrate with immediate family members only as I had seen her grandparents visiting them last day.
I was just going to bath my kids and then the calling bell rang. It was her mother. She was in a hurry and mumbled, sorry, we decided to celebrate her birthday only now. That is why I didn’t inform earlier. Please do come within 10 minutes! I was confused what is happening and sad as I didn’t have time to buy any gift for this kid. I usually don’t go to kids birthdays without gifts as kids look forward for such gifts. I know my daughter always starts dreaming about the gifts she will get on her birthday right from the starting of an year! I thought I will buy gift next day and give her. Now, I don’t have time to get gift within 10 minutes.
I went for the birthday and that is when I saw how cruelly this little girl is treated by her parents. Her father was telling us with such an arrogant expression that he didn’t want to celebrate her birthday as she didn’t get A+ in all the subjects! Just one subject she got a bit less marks and they were planning to punish her by cancelling her birthday! Then he laughed out loud and said, ” It is ok, anyways she won’t get any gifts as we informed only in the last minute. He then turned and smirked at his daughter who had turned pale now. He teased her and said, ” You won’t get any gifts this birthday. That is your punishment!” I felt my blood boil with rage and felt so bad for this little girl. I told my hubby I will be back in a minute and rushed back home with my daughter on toe. My daughter was also staring dumbfound as she was also shocked hearing someone saying like this. I knew even she felt sorry for that girl.
I hugged my daughter and said, ” Can Amma ask you a favour?” What is it Amma? Can you give any of your less used toys to her? Something that is in good condition and not used much. Something that looks as good as new? Usually, my daughter won’t agree to share her toys. But that day, she readily agreed even without a question. Even she felt bad and wanted to give her something. So, we searched around and found a barbie doll set which she hadn’t even opened. Quickly we got some gift paper and wrapped it up. Then, we rushed back and my daughter gave the gift to this little girl. Her face lit up with joy and her father looked angrily at me.
It was time for cake cutting and the little girl was happily taking the candles and trying to fit it on the cake. “you will spoil the cake, I will do it”, her father shouted at her. It is my birthday cake, I want to keep the candles, the girl meekly pleaded to her father. No! I will do it! He snatched the candles from her and set it on the cake. I was feeling sorry for the kid and didn’t want even a slice of that cake already! Even though the cake looked lovely, all its appetising appeal had vanished! We all sang birthday song and the girl cut the cake with a blank expression. No happiness, no excitement, no giggles! Is that how a kid should cut her birthday cake?
The Girl Who Always Stood On Her Knees!
It was my another neighbour who told me this first and at first I didn’t believe it. She told she always sees this girl outside her house, kneeling on the door mat and eating food. I was shocked and asked her, “Why?” Even she didn’t have an answer. She told she even took a photo and showed it to me! Indeed, it was true! The front door was shut from inside and the poor girl stood on her knees outside stuffing food into her mouth! Even my maid told me she sees this scene everyday! Later I understood from many of my friends that this is a daily ritual and the girl is “punished” for not eating food properly by making her stand on knees outside her home! I was appalled and my heart was filled with grief for this little girl.
Last day, I accidentally opened my doors during noon time and saw it. There she was! Standing alone, outside her house. The front doors shut! She stood on her knees with a blank expression. No tears, no remorse! She was silently stuffing the food into her mouth. I couldn’t stand the sight and thought of my little girl who was also of the same age. Kids are fussy eaters and almost all of us mothers struggle to make the kid eat something, Even I get angry when my daughter doesn’t eat anything and sometimes even I get angry at her and scold her for not eating. But, I would never ever think of punishing a child like this no matter how angry I got! Another point I noticed is that this girl was not crying at all! I have 2 small kiddos and both cry at the drop of a hat! I just need to look angrily and both will start crying. Whereas , here this girl was given such a cruel punishment and she never shed a tear!
Maybe she was used to punishments and it has become an everyday affair for her. Maybe she gets even more worse punishments inside her house and this is nothing worth crying for! Maybe the little one has understood that there is no point crying and shouting. When we see our kids crying, we hug them, kiss them and wipes their tears. Maybe no one does that at her home. So, maybe she thought there is no use crying. No one is going to mind her anyways!
I silently went up to her and asked her to stand up. She stood up and looked up at me with a stony expression that broke my heart into a million pieces. I have never seen such a stony expression on the face of a little girl! I asked her why she is standing there on knees? She said, “Oh! Nothing aunty! I always eat food like this! The door will open and mother will let me inside the house only if I finish the plate!” My heart was boiling with rage and I rang the calling bell. I could hear her mother’s sound from inside and when I looked at her, saw her stuffing the whole curry all at once into her mouth! Maybe she was afraid her mother will beat her and was stuffing it all inside her mouth!
Her mother opened the door angrily and stared at me with an even more angrier expression. I asked her, “why do you do this? She is a little girl!” She looked angrily at me and started lashing out to me! Look! This is my daughter and I know how to manage her! This is none of your business! We never poke our nose in someone else’s family matters and I hope you also don’t do that! I was a bit taken aback seeing her rage and just told, Ok! Still I don’t think you should do this. And I turned back to my house. I could hear the door slamming behind me and the mother beating the girl harshly. The girl was crying out loud and I felt guilty whether it was me who was the cause for the beatings the girl was getting now! My son ran upto me and hugged me telling, Amma, I’m afraid! I saw fear in his little eyes as he heard the sound of beatings inside!
I walked back to my home feeling defeated, dejected and ashamed of myself! Ashamed because I couldn’t help her. Ashamed because I made her mother even more angry. Now the girl will have to bear her mother’s wrath because of me!
Is This The Way To Make Your Kid Eat Food?
All mothers out here, is this the way to make a fussy eater eat food? No! Never! It won’t do the kid any good if you are punishing a kid like this! I had wondered why the kid was so rebellious years back! But, now, I know the answer! Her parents made her so! Years of cruel punishments made a sweet little girl a rebellious girl who hits at all her classmates! Years of beating and standing on knees made her little face expressionless! She never laughs out loud or smiles mischievously like her peers. She is always stone faced! No expression, no smile! Just a look of fear as her parents approach her!
Recently her little 1 year old brother was admitted in hospital with burns all over his body. They said the child pushed a pan of hot tea and it fell on his body. The hot tea burned his body peeling away the little skin. The father took a close up picture of the crying baby with burns all over his body before rushing him to the hospital. Nowadays, he shows that picture to everyone. My friend saw the picture and told me it is such a horrifying picture! Why does a father do this? We put pictures of our smiling kids on our mobiles and show it proudly to our friends. But, here a father shows a picture of his baby boy with burns all over his body proudly to all his friends!
This article might leave you with so many unanswered questions. But, even I don’t know the answers to all the questions that crosses your mind! Even I’m appalled, angry, hurt and helpless!